Pre Script: I know I haven't updated in a while, but I'm the kind of guy that doesn't like to put up a lot of filler. I don't like posting unless I have something to post, so I apologize for having taken so long. I've got some new stuff to put up, but I want everyone to realize I'm still here before I go on a posting binge.

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I checked the date.

March 11.

Good. For a minute, I thought it was Groundhog's Day.

The entire week felt like it was the same day repeating itself in an infinite loop. The only variances in the days consisted of which aircraft I shot down over the skies of 1918 Flanders or what team I happened to demolish in the 1991 NFL season. Little from that week stood out in my mind. It was all nothing but one big haze of flashing swords, burning pieces of plywood, and mechanical objects traveling at various barrier shattering speeds.

That was supposed to have been my killer spring break.

Where were the hot women? Where were the sandy beaches? Where were the half-naked teenagers lustfully clinging to each other in some vain attempt to reenact a soft-core porn scene?

Oh wait, I had forgotten. It's Michigan, in the middle of March. The fantasy of a 1970's beach party cannot be found here, as most sane teens are either out of the area, or, like me, have locked themselves indoors.

Staring into my life support monitor computer screen, I flipped through blog entries, hoping to find that someone I knew was having a better spring break than I was.

Well, ok, I didn't actually care that much. I was just bored and wanted something to read while I ate my sundae.

Despite my greatest efforts, this was the best thing I could find. Not that there's anything wrong with Mountain Dew and RPG's, but come on! That sounds like something I, Admiral Antisocialism, would have come up with. Surely someone could have come up with something better than that!

Oh wait, I had forgotten. It's Michigan, in the middle of March. The utopia of a close-knit family enjoying warm, fuzzy moments cannot be found here, as most people still have jobs to go to. Oh, and most teens are also nowhere to be found in public.

Finding no love on the Internet, I slid over to the window behind be to assess the weather. Perhaps I could go jogging?

Oh wait, I had forgotten. It's Michigan, in the middle of March. The dream of me enjoying the peaceful weather that is associated with spring break was shattered by the thermometer reading a temperature below freezing.

Whoever forced us to have our break at this time of year should be drug out into the street, placed beside what's left of President Bush's rotting carcass, and have his head blown off in a similar fashion.*

I guess what I'm trying to say is this: why did spring break have to be so crappy this year?

* = Inside joke for anyone who was in my POD class in high school.

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